Sunday with mom and cousins

On Sunday, I met my mom and two cousins. Previously, I had met one cousin, but today her younger sister came along. I met them at a subway station. I was looking around for them, but they were sitting in my mom's car. She drives a Hyundai and she is a pretty good driver.

First, we went to Changdeokgung Palace with a Secret Garden. It is a Palace in the middle of the city. It is one of the few preserved palaces in Korea. It is over 100 acres in area. They require following a tour guide when visiting, partly to get understanding of the history and probably for better care of the area. It has many beautiful buildings and the back half is a wonderful tree-lined area with a couple ponds.

Afterwards, we drove to my mother's house. Sundays happen to be the day for demonstrations in the downtown area. Traffic was terrible even though it was Sunday. My mother lives just outside of Seoul, but it is similar to living in a suburb of Seoul. Her place is new because she just moved into her place in July.

The apartment is 2 bedrooms, den, living room, kitchen, and some other balcony type areas. She has well furnished house. She lives alone and seems to live comfortably. She doesn't have a computer, but is considering because of email and keeping contact with her relatives in Atlanta, GA.

For dinner, my mom bought a couple ducks with Korean side dishes. Since she thought I would be hungry, she had my cousins and I eat before my mom's oldest brother and wife came. It was quite delicious and didn't have to strong of a game flavor.

After awhile, my mom's oldest brother and wife came. He also is in education. He is a principal of a high school in Seoul, so he has a very good job. My uncle can speak a little English, but his wife can't really say anything. Also, I figured out that my mom can say a few things in English and she understand somethings that I say.

Once it was late enough, my mom called Atlanta where her 2nd older brother lives with his wife, my grandmother, and son. I was given the phone and talked to all of them. It was very interesting talking to my grandmother. She has lived in the US since she was about 65 years old and now she is about 85. She still struggles saying things in English and she was a little disappointed that she couldn't say more. I probably should have been able to say more in Korean, but my Korean is so, so, so poor. It was nice to know that I have relatives in Atlanta, New York City, and somewhere in NJ.

As usual, I received a few more gifts. For gifts, I received a scarf, cake, and chocolates. Oh, my cousins and I were all given 20 dollars from my uncle. So, my cousins and I were happy to have some "pocket money" (Konglish).

My mom asked me a few questions. Also, I asked a few questions, but I didn't really have any good questions. I did find out that David was born about 9:30pm and I was born about 9:45pm with a natural delivery. My cousins thought it was a little bit of a strange question since it isn't that much difference in time. At the end of the night, my mother home. My mother is so happy to seem, but I feel so bad when I have to leave. Before I leave for SF, I will spend a night or two at my mother's house.

Jejudo/Udo trip

Last weekend, I asked my father if wanted to go to Jejudo. Jejudo is a small island off of the southern coast of Korea. It is kinda like the Hawai'i of Korea. It is also the place that my father was born and where a few relatives live.

After the short 50 min flight, I met my father's cousin. He was our personal chauffeur; he also is a taxi driver. We drove to Seongsan (volcanic cone). We hiked up Seongsan to get a good view of the east side of Jeju. My father enjoys hiking, but doesn't really inform me to wear proper shoes. I guess I should realize this by now. He would go up at a quick pace, but his cousin and I enjoyed a few breaks on the way up. It isn't that high, but still quite a few stairs to climb.

After Seongsan, we took a ferry to Udo, an even smaller island. On the ride over, we could see ladies in the ocean who dive for various shellfish. They wear wetsuits, but use no breathing devices. They have been trained to hold their breath for long amounts of time. I am not sure how deep they dive, but they are a long swim from shore. The only thing they have with them is a big floatation balloon.

First, we went to the coral sand beach. The beach is snow white. On the beach, there was one of the divers selling her shellfish, so we ate some raw "unknown" shellfish. Afterwards, we drove around the small island. We stopped at this very small house. I was exactly sure where we were until my father's cousin said, "amoni", which means mother. This is when I met my father's aunt. She was a cute old lady. I presume she lives alone on the island. She served various raw shellfish, not exactly sure what it all is. She showed me some pictures she had hanging on the wall of my relatives. We ate, took a couple photos, and before we left she hands me an envelope. Yep, I received 100,000 Won ($108).

In the afternoon we visited gravesites of different relatives. On Udo, we visited what would be my father's great, great grandparents and great grandparents. Back on Jejudo, we went to my father's grandmother's and grandfather's graves. It was your typical sightseeing, but I guess my father wanted to do the traditional Korean thing and for me to know where my Korean family is.

On the second day, we visited Jeongbang Waterfall. It is a small waterfall on the south side of Jejudo, but it is right on the coast. Yep, there were more stairs, but beautiful area. Next, we visited Seogwipo World Cup Stadium (cap. 50,000) and wasted some time at the Agricultural Expo. It was quite boring because everything was in Korean, but my father was trying to explain things. He has a lot of difficulty with English, so it wasn't too enjoyable.

After an hour or so, his other cousin came by. He is the older brother of taxi driver cousin. We went to a nice restaurant. I met the older cousins' wife, daughter, and two grandkids. They didn't speak any English, so I just focused on eating and letting my father talk to them.

Two weeks ago, I met some more relatives. My great uncle's daughter, husband (dentist), and two sons (4 and 6 years old) came from Busan area to meet for dinner with me and great uncle's son. They have on other daughter, but she is young, so they didn't bring her. We went for dinner in Gangnam area. They live near Busan and I am guessing that they flew up to Seoul for the day to meet me. It was interesting to meet another relative and her family.

Meeting Korean Mom and ...

On Thursday, November 1st, 2007, I met my biological mother. SWS, adoption agency, arranged for us to meet at their office with a translator. It was all so fast. I didn't find out until noon the day before that SWS had been able to contact my mother. So, they emailed me and I suggested a time ASAP.

I arrived at SWS early because that is how like to set it up. As I was waiting, In Heiryung, translator, told me that my mom was on her way, but was stuck in traffic. Also, she mentioned that I would be meeting her younger sister, her husband, and daughter. So instead of just my mom, I would be meeting aunt, uncle, and cousin. Ah, I was getting quite nervous.

Not much longer, they arrived. I had no idea what to expect. My mother came over to me, hugged me, and was crying. I don't know how to say it, but it was a relief to finally meet her. I was in shock and my emotions didn't really know what to feel. It is an experience that is so unique. Sometimes, it seems like this person is totally a stranger, but you look at them and think, "I look like her."

My mother is an elementary school teacher. She lives about 25 minutes away from me on the subway, so actually pretty close. She lives alone. She comes from a family with 4 children. She was the third child. She has two older brothers and a younger sister. The second son lives in Atlanta. The oldest sons' children attend universities in NY. One of the brothers is also a teacher. Their mother wanted them to be teachers since they were a somewhat poor family and teaching is a very good job in Korea.

On this meeting, I met my mom's younger sister. She is a middle school teacher and is married to a high school teacher. They have two daughters, who attend university. The one I met, Ye-Seul goes to Yonsei University (one of the three prestigious universities of Korea) for interior design. She can speak pretty good English. She did study English for a semester or so in Atlanta. To further her studies, she is planning to go attend a school in the UK next year for six months. The younger one had an exam, so she was unable to attend.

She always thought about us and if she would be able to see us again. In the past, relationships between her and my father were not good. I didn't ask any of the difficult situations of the past, but she wondered why "adoption" was decided, when she would have liked to try taking care of us. I don't know all of the answers to the questions or when I will ever be able to know what story is correct. She said she had lots to say, but since she can't speak English, it is difficult for her to say either because of language or translator.

After chatting at SWS, we went to a nice restaurant. We had Korean food because I suggested it to the translator before they arrived. The translator picked a very nice restaurant that had private dining rooms. It was a little expensive, but nice to have a conversation without any distractions. They asked more questions about David, my twin, and American family. They were happy to see that both us were well educated and seemingly successful.

Health was also a concern. My mom asked about my leg and to see if I needed surgery since she knew that I had a bad left leg as a child. She also wondered if I would be tall and skinny like my father. She said that I looked very similar to one of her nephews. I guess one of her nephews is a little (ok, a lot) bigger also.

They asked a lot of questions. It was a little difficult to answer the questions about my father. I didn't really know what to say because I didn't know if she would still be upset. Afterwards, she said that she wasn't upset anymore at my father and asked how he felt about her. I haven't asked him, so I didn't know what to say. I talked to the translator and she said translating most of it would be ok.

Even though, I am planning to leave Korea soon, I am thankful that I have had this opportunity. I will try to spend as much time as possible with my mother and father. This weekend, I will go to Jejudo with my father and I already have plans to meet my mother next weekend.