Saturday, January 13th
I had a meeting arranged to meet my Korean father at Social Welfare Society (SWS). The manager agreed to facilitate this meeting since my work schedule doesn't allow for a weekday meeting even though SWS is only open Monday thru Friday. Dr. Kim accompanied me to SWS because the location isn't too easy to find, but now I could find it, if I need.
I arrived at SWS and talked with the manager briefly. She asked if I had any questions, but I didn't know what to ask. After a little bit, she left and my father arrived. They talked in the other room and I waited nervously.
In a couple minutes, they entered the room. I didn't know what to say. My Korean father is quite tall. I would say that he is two or three inches taller than me. Now, he is about 60 years old and he looks very healthy. The manager said that it unusual for someone of his age to still be so tall.
He came over to me and greeted me. The first thing he did was check out my physical appearance. First, he felt my legs. He remembered that I had problems with my legs as a young child, so he had to make sure that they were okay. For those who don't know, I had problems with my legs and they were quite bowed as a child, especially my left leg.
We sat down and talked. The manager translated, so that we could communicate. He told me about the situation that was the reason for my twin and I to be adopted. He worked at a low level in a local government office and earned a small salary. My grandmother took care of us, but she fell ill when we almost three. He wasn't able to afford care for us and my grandmother wasn't able to take care of us.
Later, he told me what happened to my mother. When she was pregnant with David and I, the two mother-in-laws had many arguments and the two families were not in good relationships. My mother went to her parent's home to give birth. She stayed home for four months after we were born. At that point, she brought us to my father's home. Afterwards, my father didn't hear from my mother. The relationship was poor, so he decided to divorce her. The two families sued each other and it took one and a half years for the courts to resolve the issues.
He said that I could maybe search for my mother in ten years or so. He wouldn't mention any more details. In ten years, my mother should be about 65 years old and she would be retired. I don't know what I will do about it, but only time will tell.
He showed me pictures that he had kept. He had pictures from when we were two and three years old. Also, he had some photos from when my American parents sent some to the adoption agency. My mother had written a note to someone (can't remember the name), but I easily recognized my mother's handwriting. He gave me a few of the photos, but I don't have any memory of when they were taken. In one photo, it shows that I definitely have some problem with my leg because it looks severely bowed.
He also brought a church bulletin for me. He is a faithful Christian and he thought I might like to attend church. He attends a Presbyterian Church. The church is over 100 years old. They have a service with English translation.
I had a meeting arranged to meet my Korean father at Social Welfare Society (SWS). The manager agreed to facilitate this meeting since my work schedule doesn't allow for a weekday meeting even though SWS is only open Monday thru Friday. Dr. Kim accompanied me to SWS because the location isn't too easy to find, but now I could find it, if I need.
I arrived at SWS and talked with the manager briefly. She asked if I had any questions, but I didn't know what to ask. After a little bit, she left and my father arrived. They talked in the other room and I waited nervously.
In a couple minutes, they entered the room. I didn't know what to say. My Korean father is quite tall. I would say that he is two or three inches taller than me. Now, he is about 60 years old and he looks very healthy. The manager said that it unusual for someone of his age to still be so tall.
He came over to me and greeted me. The first thing he did was check out my physical appearance. First, he felt my legs. He remembered that I had problems with my legs as a young child, so he had to make sure that they were okay. For those who don't know, I had problems with my legs and they were quite bowed as a child, especially my left leg.
We sat down and talked. The manager translated, so that we could communicate. He told me about the situation that was the reason for my twin and I to be adopted. He worked at a low level in a local government office and earned a small salary. My grandmother took care of us, but she fell ill when we almost three. He wasn't able to afford care for us and my grandmother wasn't able to take care of us.
Later, he told me what happened to my mother. When she was pregnant with David and I, the two mother-in-laws had many arguments and the two families were not in good relationships. My mother went to her parent's home to give birth. She stayed home for four months after we were born. At that point, she brought us to my father's home. Afterwards, my father didn't hear from my mother. The relationship was poor, so he decided to divorce her. The two families sued each other and it took one and a half years for the courts to resolve the issues.
He said that I could maybe search for my mother in ten years or so. He wouldn't mention any more details. In ten years, my mother should be about 65 years old and she would be retired. I don't know what I will do about it, but only time will tell.
He showed me pictures that he had kept. He had pictures from when we were two and three years old. Also, he had some photos from when my American parents sent some to the adoption agency. My mother had written a note to someone (can't remember the name), but I easily recognized my mother's handwriting. He gave me a few of the photos, but I don't have any memory of when they were taken. In one photo, it shows that I definitely have some problem with my leg because it looks severely bowed.
He also brought a church bulletin for me. He is a faithful Christian and he thought I might like to attend church. He attends a Presbyterian Church. The church is over 100 years old. They have a service with English translation.
My grandmother was an amazing lady. She was a very beautiful women. She attended Ewha Women's University. This university is 120 years old and a very prestigious university in Korea today. While attending, she was elected the "queen" of the university. My father said that she was very smart and beautiful. She took care of my brother and I from four months old to three years old. He said that we were very well behaved boys when my grandmother was present, but we would fight often when she was not. My father and grandmother also could not understand us some times because David and I had our own language. She had given us nicknames, but the translator could not translate them. He said that she loved us very much. My father said that she fell ill when we were three and passed away shortly after we were adopted.
He didn't mention a lot about his father or grandparents. He said that he had studied in Japan and had reached a quite high level in Judo (a form of martial arts). His father grew up on Jeju Island. Jeju Island is a very popular location because it has a sub-tropical climate. He had a good business on Jeju that did something with trading and going to Osaka, Japan and Qingdao, China. After the war, business changed, so my grandfather and grandmother moved to Seoul.
Most of my father's relatives live in or near Seoul. Next time we meet, he will introduce me to them. My father is an only child, but he has many cousins and other relatives. In one of the pictures, David and I are with my father's cousin's daughter. She would be about 40 years old. My father almost brought her along for the meeting since she speaks English, but decided not do it. She works for foreign company, so she and some other relatives will be able to translate the next time we meet.
He told me about his current situation. He remarried a couple years after giving us up because he was lonely. He thought hard about remarrying after his first marriage. He said that his wife may have an idea about my twin and I because he told the matchmaker. He thinks the matchmaker would have mentioned this to her. He never talked about it with his wife and she never talked about it. So, he isn't sure exactly. He said that he is considering to tell them, but I told him that he shouldn't feel pressured to tell them. He thought that his son, age 24, might be interested. His son always said that he wanted a brother or sister.
My half brother is fulfilling his military service. In Korea, all able bodied men ages 20-35 have to serve two years in a military branch. My half brother studied music at a university. I told my father that I didn't have any music ability and he laughed because he doesn't either. He said that his wife has musical talent and his son must have learned from her.
Overall, this was a great day. My father was quite relieved to know that David and I are doing well. I am glad that I had the opportunity to meet him. I am looking forward to the day that I can meet other relatives. I hope that is soon and I will have more pictures and stories.
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